Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? Galatians 1:10a (NIV)
If you’ve ever felt manipulated, there was most likely a controller in the mix. That’s right, someone who wanted to be in charge—not just of their own life—but also of yours. And all the while, they proclaim that they are “just trying to help.” Well, sometimes, “help” is the sunny side of “control.”
The best way to discern whether or not their help has crossed over into control is just that. Have they crossed your boundaries? Are you feeling put down, as though they know your mind better than you? Or they, rather than you, know what is best for you? Are you feeling uncomfortable, or even angry?
Don’t negate your feelings? God gave us the capacity to feel for a reason—often to protect us from danger. The stove is hot and we pull away to protect our skin from being burned. Our emotional feelings serve the same purpose—a warning signal that something is wrong.
Don’t allow yourself to be manipulated or controlled by a controller who obviously needs to feel superior or who is not aware of their own hidden motives. Kindly take whatever action is needed to preserve your dignity and self-respect. Set your boundaries, without hesitation, and stay healthy!