Crystal Clear: Thoughts on Marriage

What if God’s wisdom on marriage was crystal clear to us from the start? Maybe there would be more happiness, fewer broken homes. Unfortunately, most of us have to glean our clarity on marriage from our own failures and mistakes, learning the hard way.

What if the purpose of marriage is to honor God?  That doesn’t sound like the first thought that comes to mind when we are contemplating marriage. It’s more like love, physical intimacy, companionship, family, and growing old together, right?These are all legitimate and healthy aspects of marriage, but there’s more.  Marriage provides a pathway for deep spiritual growth as we choose to honor God in our relationship with our husband or wife.

Having a servant’s heart toward each other is one way to not only honor each other but to also honor God in your marriage. There’s nothing more beautiful than to see a man and woman gladly serving each other, when it is mutual and not one sided.  When it is about more than the human relationship it goes higher in purpose to please and honor God. Lovingly serving each other will grow your love, not diminish it. It will enrich you, not diminish you.

Husbands and wives need to love and respect each other. This is not negotiable! Speaking specifically to wives, you need to respect your husband. This not only honors him and your marriage, but it also honors God. Every word, action, and motivation should flow from a deep respect for your husband.

If you’ve blown it in this area it’s never too late to start.  As you begin to treat him with respect he will most likely strive to live up to your high opinion of him.  As your words and actions make him feel worthy of respect, he won’t want to lose that by letting you down.  A man feels a deep sense of satisfaction when respected by his wife.

And, we all know how much a man needs to love his wife. Most women thrive when they feel truly loved by their husband.  Husbands, make the effort to find out what makes your wife feel loved and go for it! That’s part of truly knowing her. You may be amazed at how your wife responds to your expressions of love!  And, you are truly honoring God in the process.  It’s a beautiful thing when both husband and wife seek to be an extension of God’s love to each other!

After 30 years of being a Marriage Counselor, I have a lot more to say about marriage, but not tonight. Maybe in future blogs. 🙂

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